...They that wait on the Lord...

I decided the other day that today (Sunday) would be a day for re-establishing my focus...

The last few weeks have been flipping hectic, and as you can see from my last post, finding time for God has been a struggle. But now the pressure's off a little - I have some time in the evenings as of today, now that most of the students have gone back home for the hols, and I really really want to spend some quality time with God... an hour in the morning, sorting out my focus for the day, praying for friends and a little bit of worship just doesn't cut it when what i'm looking for is intimacy...

It seems as though God agrees too... I felt Him speak to me in church this morning... I noted it down:

"Chris, it's not about Sunday mornings.

Wait for me. Wait for revalation of me. Wait for my Glory.

Wait for my voice.

If you want to hear me, then wait on me."


So like I say, a semi-rushed, fairly-structured, no-time-to-listen prayer time each morning just ain't gonna cut it any more.

I remembered recently just how good it is to spend a whole day with someone I love - and I really want to be able to find that place with God. So... enough blogging, time to start waiting and listening... :-)

It's a good job I don't have any other commitments today... phew!

God bless,

C

...Now it springs up, do you not perceive it?

It's interesting... When times are hard, it often becomes (after the initial struggle) so easy to find God, because you often have no choice but to rely on Him, to find comfort in His arms, to cast all your worries and cares upon Him...

But when times get better again?

Therein lies the difficulty.

The last ten days have been SUCH a good time: work went well, I went to my first opera, the sun finally came out, I played my first game for the firsts lacrosse team and I really enjoyed some great friendships - spending time with one friend particularly...

I'm overcome by just how easy it is to forget to thank Him when he does everything you ask for, and more.

But I'm determined to keep my focus on Him. To stay in this place that He's led me into. To find out what these passions are that He's beginning to stir up in my soul. Most of all, to keep Him at number one in my heart.


I was reading the verse 'Delight yourself in the Lord and He will give you the desires of your heart' (Ps 37) earlier. It's such a famous verse, and I used to love making all it about me. But I was taught a few years ago what it meant... It's much easier to understand in the context of the following verse: 'Commit your way to the Lord; Trust in Him and He will do this.'

The light begins to dawn on what the original verse means - A follows B, not the other way round. When I delight myself in the Lord - love Him, worship Him, commit my life to Him, keep my focus on Him, then He will simeltaneously (sp??) be doing a deep work in my heart.

The 'desires of my heart' will be pretty similar to the desires of His heart. Which will be tied in with His perfect plan for my life.

Which will be pretty darn good.

Right, enough blogging for now.

God bless all.

C

..."I am doing a new thing"

Seven weeks.

There's not really any way I can write down what's gone on in my life since my last blog. To be honest, if I could... well, suffice to say a lot of it is just for me and God.

What I will say is this: It was the light at the end of the tunnel. Eventually, God brought me out of the desert, but he did it through the fire - now I'm in a place where I can hear his voice again, he's waking up passions I had long-since forgotten, exciting new passions I hadn't ever imagined I would have, teaching me to pray 'like a dying man' and, most of all, making me so, so hungry.

There are about half a dozen people who I really need to express something to - over the last 2 months, spiritually the hardest of my life so far, you have stood by me in prayer all the way. You know who you are. I quite literally could not have made it to this place without your support. You've taught me the meaning of love, dedication and friendship, and I hope that someday I can be there for you when you need it, offering even half of what you've done for me.

So I feel more or less back on track - it feels like it's time to start blogging my life again!

God's asked me to keep my future fully open to Him... so, when I finish this job in just under 4 months, I have more or less no plans. No job, nowhere to live, not even a home town (folks are moving away from Cambridge). And, once the fear had subsided, I realised how comfortable I am in this situation - Me, the perpetual plan-maker... happy that the plan is 'no plan'. I think it's due to the excitement of what God may do...

Last of all... I've felt Him ask me a question recently. It's been asked to quite a few people, most significantly to one of my heroes of the faith. He doesn't want an immediate reply it would seem, I think He wants me to think about it:

Hoe feci pro te; quid facis pro me?

I'll let you know the answer when I find out what it is.